oh wanderlust

This is seriously going to get personal, you ready?
Uh ohhh

The last time you felt honestly broken?
Well I was sick again a good part of today… but I’m not broken. Just cursing my worries away :)

Are you craving something?
Not really but food’s a good start!

If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
Something cool. Like the ability to control time. And don’t worry, I know with great power comes great responsibility. Muahahaaaa. Keke.

Would you rather have ten kids, or none?
Uh… 10’s a little much.

What do you hear right now?
Whirring of the ceiling fan because my body temperature decided to be bipolar today.

Is your bed against more than one of your walls?
Nahh.

What’s on your mind right now?
I know there should be things but I don’t really care right now. Just happy to be home(:

Are you there for your friends?
I try.

Last person to see you cry?
I can’t cry in front of people. It’s like… a stab to my pride or something lol

What do you do when you get nervous?
Play with my hair, scrape nail polish off my nails, chew my bottom lip. Hahaha I’m such a freak…

Be honest, do you like people in general?
Yeah I believe there’s a good in everyone even though some are just outright bitches/jerks… I try to pick something nice out of them. But, there’s a limit to such an attempt.

How old do you think you will be when you finally have kids?
Like when I feel like it. LOL jk iono after I get married.

Does anyone completely understand you?
Ehh… sometimes it’s hard for ME to even understand myself.

Do you have a reason to smile right now?
Yeah I wuv my famfam. Sorry I don’t know why I’m talking like this… 

Has anyone told you they don’t ever wanna lose you?
Um… if I don’t recall anything of this sort… is it bad?

Would you be happier if life had a rewind button?
Lol sometimes. I’d be happier if I could control time!!! Kekeke

Do you tell your mom or dad everything?
Pretty much, yeah. Like things that really bother me because they know best.

Does it matter to you if your boyfriend or girlfriend smokes?
Yeah… it means I’m going to freakin die first from secondhand smoking.

Are you going to get hurt anytime soon by someone?
What… is this trying to say, come on now

This time last year, can you remember who you liked?
Nope cuz I liked no one. :)

Do you think more about the past, present, or future?
Present and future and sometimes past when I want a little laugh. 

How many hours of sleep do you get a night?
Either too much or too little, and both ways I still get hella tired…

Are you easy to get along with?
YEAH WHY NOT! :D

Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with?
No wayyy she’s my bestie.

What was the last drink that you put in your mouth?
Sparkling apple cider.

What size bed do you have?
Queen. 

Do you start the water before you get in the shower or when you get in?
Before.

Do you like the rain?
NU!!!!!

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
Wouldn’t it be like super funny if I was thinking about someone and they get notified and they think about me? LOL

Ok, I agree. That’s creepy. 

Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t do?
Hm… nope.

Would people refer to you as a goodie goodie, bad news, or neither?
I don’t get it. Why can’t I be good news

Who were you last in the car with, besides family?
Bunch of people… sorry forgot names already.

What’s the last movie you saw in theaters and with who?
I have been movie theatre deprived so yeah.

Have you ever kissed someone who had a boyfriend/ girlfriend?
Do I look that incompetent? 

Have you ever been hurt by someone you never thought would hurt you?
Hm… not really. I really can’t think of anyone now.

Your parents are out of town. Would you throw a massive party?
No I love my parents too much.

Do you regret a past relationship?
Hahahaha.

Would you rather spend a Friday night at a concert or a crazy party?
Can’t I just chill with food and be content that way?? Give me a definition for a crazy party, give me a definition for concert.

Do you tend to fall for the same type of person over and over?
Errrm… well. I like Asians.

Have you made a joke about somebody that made them cry?
LOL it’s ok I love you.

Do you care too much about your appearance?
Ehh most of the time I just wake up and go.

Are you a jealous person?
What? No I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?
Hehehe I can’t wait to!!!

Do you miss anyone?
Yes, I do.

Last person who made you cry?
People don’t make me cry. The situation does. Ok, fine, people do too but I can’t remember the last time.

Does your ex piss you off?
No ex to piss me off, just ordinary stupid people. Haha jk :P God, I talk too much. Whatever; who cares.

What are you doing tomorrow?
Shop, eat, friends, family, heartheartheart.

Are you the type of person who has a new boyfriend/ girlfriend every week?
Lol there’s a “type of person” for that? Wowies…

Is there anyone you want to come see you?
YESH!!!!!!!!

Have you ever been cheated on?
Oh hell no. 

Ever given your all to someone who walked away?
I’ve never given my all and they better not walk away from me.

Do you like cotton candy?
Omg YES!!! ^___~

Who was the last person you had a serious conversation with?
Um… I don’t recall. I’m always laughing whenever I talk with someone…

Do you have siblings?
Yup, a brother and a sister.

Have you ever fallen asleep on someone?
Lols probably. Don’t remember.

How has the past week been for you?
Pretty boring and cold and stuff.

Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
Yup.

What’s on your mind right now?
Not much. I’m kinda hungry actually…

What were you doing at midnight last night?
Playing piano kekeke

What is your current mood?
Content :D

Who was the first person you talked to today?
Mommy, when she was yelling for me to get out of bed while I die of overnight sickness. Kekeke

Will this week be a good one?
I will miss it with all my heart.

Anything happen to you within the past month that made you really happy?
Hm… I’ve had happy times.

Who were you with last night?
Wtf is this suggesting lol

Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?
In the past, yeah lol. I remember I would make someone talk to me so I could fall asleep and I’d just hum or something in response. I was mean.

Next time you will kiss someone?
I will kiss my cutie patootie baby sister :D

Who should start the kiss, the girl or the boy?
Okieee… this isn’t what I had in mind. IDK I am NOT the one to be asking this…

Do you have any plans for the weekend?
Food? And fun and laughter and hopefully never ever getting sick again because it seems like my stupid immune system has gotten the flu virus WAY enough times so that it should actually start being IMMUNE to it… gaaah!!! 

If you get $1 Million for breaking up with your boyfriend/girlfriend, would you?
If they were being mean to me or cheating or something, yeah, why not? 

Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4 and write the sentence here.
…carrying dozens of students and other teach…

Who are you dating?
Flyin solo

How long have you been dating?
Umm refer to above^

Sometimes, it’s been really difficult for me to really sit there and smile and be happy. I know people have gone through it, yeah? Well, when there are so many things on my mind, I, myself, am a conflict that even I don’t know where to even start to handle. I am scared of life, to put it bluntly. Thus, I am scared of the unknown. With that in mind, I can honestly say I am amidst of my own worst fears.  

With all the stress my classes are currently causing me, I am afraid to say these words. I am afraid to back down, to regret, and even if I do turn around, where do I turn to? I hope it’s just a phase that I’m going through, but currently my life is full of “I don’t knows” and “Where do I go?” and “I don’t want to go through this anymore” and “But I do not want to quit, I do not want to fail my loved ones”. I am afraid to admit it, but I will take the first step and brave through this fear: I feel like a mess. No, I am a mess.

I’ve reached the point where I am searching on the internet for ways to get good luck, for mantras of any kind. Am I insane? Nah, insane’s not the word. Superstitious, yeah I’ve always been a little of it. But I believe because I hope. Or maybe, I just feel desperate. But I don’t want to admit it, and yet I just did. [Hold for applause.]

Perhaps I might be going through the winter blues. I often get sad when winter comes. For years, it’s the season that seems the most bipolar to me in tides of emotions. Lack of sun seems to make me feel a little low than usual. OR maybe it’s just school, and winter just seems like an ideal time for teachers to give stress attacks. Damn school. Ok, it’s school. I am stressed as hell trying to write stories for my journalism class. It’s unfair how my professor not only assigns beats, but that some people got better more newsworthy beats than other people. And the fact that a factual error freebie for the whole class gets handed down to another student just because she got her story in first just pissed me off. Did he, I don’t KNOW, think her beat was EASIER to report and write on for her to get the freebie above, thus before, others? Yeah, now the whole damn class is doomed. He’s such a nice professor, and I know he can teach. I want to like him, really, but his class itself is making my hair turn white. I literally sleep and wake up to thinking about that class. I can picture him telling the whole class, “Yeah, well, life’s unfair,” but why does he have to follow such a depressing statement? WHY CAN’T YOU BE FAIR IN A CLASSROOM SETTING YOU HAVE POWER OVER? I should get a printer. I need a printer. Maybe a printer will help. Hahaha I sound crazy but. I need a. Printer. The library is so far away… 

Then there’s the subjective class. The class I want to participate in but every person who gets to sit in front seem to have the first word. I want to sit in front but I can’t because I have a class right before it on the opposite side of the campus. And it’s killing me. 

I’m sorry. But some of the people here, I do not like. I am annoyed and saddened I have to meet these sort of people. Yeah, I know that’s mean, but I just can’t lie while I’m at this. Why I have to see them practically everyday, OMFG!!!, I am practically struggling to keep myself in a positive mood.  

Ha. I definitely feel like home. 

I might just be bantering, complaining even. Although, I need an outlet. No one deserves to sit there for me to complain all night an day to, so Tumblr, thanks for volunteering. I feel better when I get things off my chest, and writing is my means of way when words fail me and tears just doesn’t cut it. 

Well this was a depressing post… Don’t get me wrong, there are definitely other nice things in my life. :) But right now, I am REALLY troubled by all my stress and so I spill it out plain and simple just to get them off my burdened back. I sound emo, but I’m not! Trust me lols. When I’m done with all this shhhh, I’ll write about the happier things. :D